We moved to Hazel Green in the middle of February. We continued Aubree's hitting lessons, but one thing was now set in stone and accepted. Until she grew, she was never going to drive the ball out of the infield nor was she going to beat any throws out. This isn't anything new, if you've been reading. It was just tough to accept until that moment. Finally speaking it gave it life and acceptance. Don't work with the tools you want, work with the tools you have.
This presented a problem. She was a good second baseman, but she was an absolute liability hitting. Perhaps if she could play other positions, teams might show some interest. There was still that arm. In the end, we had to address the underlying issue, something she couldn't help: her size.
Aubree had always been on the bottom of the growth chart. That wasn't shocking. We are short people. I was barely on there, myself. I was stocky so at least my weight would put me in the 25% range. Aubree wasn't on the height or weight chart, at all. We didn't realize that was such a big deal. But we knew we wanted her to grow and the doctors, for years, had said that they considered putting her on artificial hormones to get her to grow. So, we scheduled a meeting with the doctor, primarily to get them to get off the fence about it.
He asked about her playing sports. At that point, she was still playing rec softball but also soccer with the local league. Between four to six days a week, she was playing. On weekends, she was traveling for soccer and playing several games a day. We were shocked when he told us that she had to quit playing two sports, for sure, but possibly even all sports for the time being. She was burning more calories than she was taking in and she WOULD NOT GROW if we couldn't fix this issue. Based upon the two sports she played, we knew that she was burning the calories in soccer. So, soccer had to go.
This was a hard thing to accept. I believe kids should play multiple sports.
This was a hard thing to accept. I believe kids should play multiple sports.
In the meantime, we had decided that we would move her to the other side of the plate and make her a slapper. Power would no longer be an issue since slappers aren't typically going to be hitting out of the infield, anyway. More importantly, it put her at least two steps closer to first base. Of course the issue was that travel ball teams were hosting tryouts and she would need months before she was game ready. Still, she had to start trying out.
This began the most frustrating part of her young softball career, at least to date. We started out trying out for an elite travel team. I knew that she probably wasn't good enough, but I thought she could ball out and maybe get lucky. I spent the entire ride trying to hype her up, or rather telling her not to screw up.
By the end of the warm-up drills, the writing was on the wall. She wasn't in the ball park with these girls. To me, she wasn't showing any urgency, either. Like she couldn't tell she was out of her league and that angered me. I felt she wasn't going to extra distance to make up for her limitations.
And I told her that, after tryouts......for the next hour.
So, of course, when we get home, I've got her out in the back yard practicing like it was her fault she wasn't prepared. And as I am yelling at her as if that will make her walk back to tryouts to get her on the team, I've got her running over the yard like it matters to those coaches. Just to be clear, this is a really bad habit that I know I have and even though I try to fix it, it still comes out. At least I was out there working with her now, taking some responsibility.
Ball at the park was taking sign ups and Coach J wanted me and Aubree to play. Even though I had kinda sworn off the rec ball and we weren't even living in that area, I agreed for a few reasons. First, Aubree needed the practice. Second, I had doubts if we would find a team in time, so this was cheap insurance to ensure she would play.
Over the next few weeks, we tried out once, twice, or sometimes three times a week with different teams. On the off nights, we practiced with the rec ball team. Seeing those girls at tryouts and just how amazing they were put a lot of doubt in my mind about Aubree's future.
Eventually after we got the "we will pass" from the coaches, my frustrations began to bubble over and I know I let a lot of it spill over onto Aubree. Even when she had great tryouts, she just wasn't good enough. She began to give up, I could see it but I sure didn't help with my negative reinforcement. I was positive to the coaches and I would basically beg them to take her. I would say things like "someone is going to take a chance on her and get an amazing player." I don't know if I really believed it.
Eventually after we got the "we will pass" from the coaches, my frustrations began to bubble over and I know I let a lot of it spill over onto Aubree. Even when she had great tryouts, she just wasn't good enough. She began to give up, I could see it but I sure didn't help with my negative reinforcement. I was positive to the coaches and I would basically beg them to take her. I would say things like "someone is going to take a chance on her and get an amazing player." I don't know if I really believed it.
We even made a team only to find out they decided not to have a 12U team.
I can't describe to you how difficult this was, as a parent. Even at her best, it wasn't good enough. We even had coaches refuse to let her try out when they saw her size. We were literally told "not to bother." And yet, when we would practice with the rec team, she was better than most of the team, if not all of them, from a technical perspective.
At this point, I had accepted that Aubree just wasn't cut out for this life. The only thing that kept me pushing forward is that I refused to believe that anyone's ball career was over at 10 or 11 years old. It was the valley, the low point for us. Still, I don't think Aubree had given up. Maybe she didn't know that was an option. Maybe she didn't understand the gulf between her and the other players.
It was at this point that I finally got it. Dropping her off at hitting lessons wasn't enough. Getting mad and making her work when her head wasn't in the game wasn't enough. We had to work, every day. I had accepted that she wasn't going to play travel ball, but we work over the season and make one next season.
In her short time at her new school, she made friends with a group of players who all played on the same travel team. Guess what. They needed another player and we needed a team.
We had to get out of this valley, some how. At this point, it didn't matter how.
I can't describe to you how difficult this was, as a parent. Even at her best, it wasn't good enough. We even had coaches refuse to let her try out when they saw her size. We were literally told "not to bother." And yet, when we would practice with the rec team, she was better than most of the team, if not all of them, from a technical perspective.
At this point, I had accepted that Aubree just wasn't cut out for this life. The only thing that kept me pushing forward is that I refused to believe that anyone's ball career was over at 10 or 11 years old. It was the valley, the low point for us. Still, I don't think Aubree had given up. Maybe she didn't know that was an option. Maybe she didn't understand the gulf between her and the other players.
It was at this point that I finally got it. Dropping her off at hitting lessons wasn't enough. Getting mad and making her work when her head wasn't in the game wasn't enough. We had to work, every day. I had accepted that she wasn't going to play travel ball, but we work over the season and make one next season.
In her short time at her new school, she made friends with a group of players who all played on the same travel team. Guess what. They needed another player and we needed a team.
We had to get out of this valley, some how. At this point, it didn't matter how.
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